3 Misconceptions Parents Might Have About Their Children’s Salvation
Clearing Up 3 Misunderstandings
As a parent of three children—now all in their teen years—I remember being afraid about their future spiritual lives. When will they trust and follow the Lord? Will they drift from the faith? How can I help point them toward the Savior, but not in a pushy way so they’re just following my instructions? I can still feel the anxiety as I thought about their souls.
Over the years, in his kindness, the Lord has helped me. He has used truths about salvation to calm my parentally anxious heart and stabilize my thinking. Here are three misconceptions about salvation that parents may need the Lord to correct.
Misconception #1: I need my child to “pray the prayer” for salvation.
It’s true that the Bible tells us that “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved” (Rom. 10:13; see also Joel 2:32 and Acts 22:16). This includes the apostle Paul (Acts 22:16) and the sinful tax collector in the temple, who prayed to the Lord and went home justified (Luke 18:9–14). The Bible communicates that it’s essential to not only believe in the heart but also to confess with the mouth (Rom. 10:9). And what is prayed—the content—is also remarkably similar throughout Scripture: I turn from my sin and I trust in the Savior—repentance and faith (Mark 1:15; Acts 20:21; 26:20; 1 Thess. 1:9).
Yet these two elements of conversion—repentance and faith—don’t just appear at the beginning of the Christian race. They mark every mile along the way.
True followers of Jesus are always turning from their sin and turning to Christ. Didn’t Jesus remind us that as often as we pray for daily bread, we should also pray for forgiveness of sins (Matt. 6:11–12; Luke 11:3–4)? Didn’t the apostle John describe the men and women who received Jesus (in the past) as those who are regularly believing in his name (in the present, John 1:12)? And didn’t the apostle Paul describe all Christians as people who make a pattern of calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ (1 Cor. 1:2)? The biblical pattern shows that both repentance and faith should be life-long habits of all true Christians.
10 Questions About Salvation
Champ Thornton
Presenting 10 questions in 30 readings on one important faith topic, this volume of the 10 Questions series helps middle-grade readers understand salvation and find joy, security, and hope in God’s gracious love.
So when your five-year-old son gets angry and throws a toy at a friend, what should you do? When your three-year-old daughter refuses to obey, what should you do?
Perhaps there are corrective consequences that need to be enforced. But regardless of the actions you take, there’s also truth to communicate. They’ve sinned against a holy God and his very good rules. It’s right and appropriate to remind your children what they’ve actually done, lead them toward repenting, and, in faith, ask Jesus to forgive them. This is the proper response to sin—always.
So why delay in encouraging your children to tell the Lord they’re sorry and ask him to forgive them? There’s no reason to wait until your child “prays for salvation.”
Instead, from the earliest days, guide your child in prayers of repentance and faith. Help them ask the Lord to turn from their sin and turn to the Savior. And pray for them and with them that the Lord would open their hearts to truly believe the good news about Jesus.
Misconception #2: I need my child to say the right words.
In the first Lord of the Rings book, a group of individuals go on a daring quest. If you’ve read the books or seen the movies, you’ll know that the road before them is often blocked. Once, the group stands before a locked and enchanted door carved into the side of a mountain. Repeatedly, various incantations are used, trying to open the stubborn door. Finally, the door’s secret is discovered. The secret word is spoken, and the massive doors swing open.
The biblical pattern shows that both repentance and faith should be life-long habits of all true Christians.
Recalling the right passwords is great for stories and for computers, but with salvation, it’s different. Certainly, the Bible tells us that conversion involves communication with God. Words—spoken or unspoken—are employed to express repentance and faith.
Yet calling on the name of the Lord is not like uttering a secret set of words or recalling the right password. Listen to the variety of expressions:
- “God, be merciful to me, a sinner!” (Luke 18:13).
- And the son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son” (Luke 15:21).
- “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom” (Luke 23:42).
- And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit” (Acts 2:38).
- “Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out” (Acts 3:19).
When it comes to salvation, the Bible never gives a word-for-word script that must be used. For an adult to tell God “I’m sorry” may or may not mean that there’s heart-felt repentance for sin. But for a child, “I’m sorry” may capture that attitude of heart perfectly. And insisting that a child uses the words “I repent” or “I turn from my sin” may be developmentally asking too much.
Typically, as a child grows, so also will their vocabulary and self-awareness. And as a Christian—as one who is regularly repenting and believing—you’re there not only to give an explanation but also to provide an example. So help them grow in understanding of what salvation, repentance, and faith mean. And help them see—even through how you respond to your own failures—what true Christianity looks like.
So, don’t be anxious over whether your son or daughter prayed the right words.
Misconception #3: I need my child to remember the date and what happened.
It’s true that the Bible speaks of conversion as an event—a moment when a sinner was given new life. One minute Lazarus was dead, the next he was breathing (Luke 11:43–44). One minute a person was in “the domain of darkness,” and the next she was “transferred . . . to the kingdom of [God’s] beloved Son” (Col. 1:13).
No one shuttles back and forth between these two kingdoms. No one is “kind of saved.” They’re either in darkness or in light (John 8:12).
Yet a person’s awareness of this conversion-moment may be unclear. Someone may not know exactly when they went from darkness to light. They may not know when they were “born again” (John 3:3, 7).
In the same way, I don’t remember when I was born. It was a June day in 1973, and I have no recollection of it. Yet I know that I was born—and I don’t need to check my birth certificate or talk to my mother. By God’s grace, I have a pulse, and air is moving in and out of my lungs.
So, in years to come, when your child wonders about when they were born again, what will you say?
Assure them that it’s okay to not recall all the events of some day or prayer in the past. Remind them that Christians are people who practice turning from sin and turning to the Savior. And most of all, point them to the Savior whose grace and love are the same yesterday, today, and forever (Heb. 13:8).
Champ Thornton is the author of 10 Questions about Salvation: 30 Devotions for Kids, Teens, and Families.
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